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August 27, 2010

The 4 Deadly Mistakes of Wife Seduction

Filed under: Business — Tags: , — kumar28 @ 8:59 am

When a guy gets turned down over and over again (during the seduction process) in his relationship with his wife (or girlfriend) he often attempts to make adjustments. You are about to learn the 4 deadly mistakes guys make when attempting to correct the problem with their "not in the mood" female partner.

Deadly Wife Seduction Mistake # 1

Trying to learn how to be an awesome lover. I’m referring to becoming better in bed. This may shock the hell out of you, but I’ll explain. Here is what the guy thinks:

The wrong approach: He thinks that if he becomes so good in bed, his wife will want to keep coming back for more.

Here is why the thinking is flawed. The guy thinks if he puts on a world class performance she will want it all the time. It doesn’t matter how good you are in bed if you are a lousy sexual salesmen she will not buy into your offer. There is a such thing as poor salesmanship. A poor salesman couldn’t sell hundred dollar bills for 50 cents.

Trust me, I’ve seen poor salesman in action. And many cases they will talk themselves out of the sale. They end up convincing the person not to buy. Keep this in mind: SEX is the product and SEDUCTION (or the word I like to use is SEXUALLY INSPIRE) is the process of selling the product. I’ll give you another example.

I could be thinking about eating a bacon cheeseburger from a certain fast food restaurant. I know it tastes great because I had it before, but I’m not inspired to eat it.

But when I see the commercial (which seduces me), I suddenly have a strong urge to have it – and as a result I will hop in my car and drive out there to get it.

So it wouldn’t matter too much if they kept trying to make the burger better and better and better. So that is the mistake that guys make. They try to improve the product (i.e sex or the burger), but NOT the more important selling process. If you have little sexual value it will be hard enough to get her to agree to have sex.

But what you do technically will not matter as much. If a woman can cum from thought a lone, then that must mean the mental side of things is very important.

Have you ever been caressing a woman and suddenly she begins to orgasm? I remember one time being alone with a female and things were getting hot and steamy. We still had our clothes on. I began rubbing her all over while kissing her. I stopped kissing her and just focused on rubbing her ? in a matter of seconds she begins to orgasm.

If you get a woman really turned on, this can happen. It depends on the woman and how your sexual value. My point is it wasn’t the fact that she was being rubbed that resulted in her cumming. It was the fact that she was being rubbed by someone with sexual value.

So when guys try to learn how to be better in bed, they are not considering the most important part ? and that is increasing their sexual value.

The right approach: 1 You must increase your sexual value 2 You must focus on selling (seduction) instead of improving the product (getting better at sex)

Deadly Wife Seduction Mistake # 2

The wrong approach: Focusing on how you should approach her. Here is why the thinking is flawed.

The guy thinks that he has to approach her a certain way and then she will accept him. He is partially right. But the fact that he focuses all of his mental energy on figuring out what the right approach is instead of working on increasing his sexual value makes him completely wrong.

If you have little sexual value it doesn’t matter how you approach her. That’s like saying:

What would a 900lb woman have to do to get you in the mood?

If she has no sexual to you, then the answer is nothing. Imagine if you saw her obsessing over how to approach you for sex. That is actually the perfect analogy because guys are more physically turned on and women are more psychologically turned on.

Wouldn’t you agree that in order for her acceptance rate to increase her sexual value would have to increase. (i.e lose weight or something).

The right approach: 1 You must increase your sexual value.

Deadly Wife Seduction Mistake # 3

The wrong approach: Trying to give her pills/herbs to make her horny. Here is why the thinking is flawed.

You can read a similar analogy on superhappysex.com (scroll down to the first Yellow Box)

If you have no sexual value then it doesn’t matter if the pills succeed in getting her horny. This actually could work against you in some cases. Here’s the deal, if she gets horny and you have no sexual value, then she would rather masturbate than to have sex with you.

And the reason why it could work against you over the long run is because if she is always in a horny state then the guys that have sexual value in her eyes are the ones that are going to be more appealing – over time.

Does that make sense?

Let’s say we lived in a world where a pig could talk and interact with you, but they still had the sexual value of a regular pig. By the way: This analogy was nominated for the Bizarre Analogy Award. (that’s a joke)

Let’s say this pig gave you (secretly or non-secretly) 2 pills of HERBAL-X ROCK HARD. These pills had 90000 mg of Yohimbe and 90000 mg of Ginseng, and any herb you can think of it had 90000 mgs of it (and miraculously your heart didn’t explode!)..in seconds your member was up in the air! (approx 5 degrees away from your belly).

Would you screw the pig if you became super aroused? The answer is no. (right?) The pig has no sexual value. So in order for you to screw the pig, it would have to increase his sexual value. It would have to maybe put on some fishnet stockings (or shed that nasty gut).

The right approach: 1 You must increase your sexual value.

Deadly Wife Seduction Mistake # 4

The wrong approach: Asking her to explain why she is not in the mood? Here is why the thinking is flawed.

The guy thinks his wife will tell him why she isn’t sexually attracted to him (anymore). And then all he has to is make the changes, and then presto!

The problem is she doesn’t know. She knows what she is consciously attracted to (i.e the nice guy that does nice things ? i.e her husband or the man she loves) but she doesn’t know what she is unconsciously attracted to.

[By the way ? Any guy that has read superlustbuttons.com knows what I mean. When you read that, you are going to beg me to take the site down so that other guys don't use that secret system]

The mechanisms that inspire horniness is foreign to her. She doesn’t know what moves her on a deep down level. Here’s an example. If you asked a person that just gave up on diet why he is no longer on the diet, he is not going to give you the real (deep down) answer.

However, he will give you the false (surface ? or what he thinks) answer and he may believe this is the truth but it’s not the truth.

It’s false.

His surface answer will be that the diet failed, or that it was a dumb diet – something like that. But the real (deep down) reason is because he may have never believed he could succeed in the first place.

He may have had no hope. He may have to increase his will-power. He may not have been serious about solving his problem.

The right approach: You must increase your sexual value. She responds unconsciously to things that she is not aware of.

Warmly,
CR James

Author of Super Sex Power: Magnetism
SuperHappySex.com

1. Increase your sexual value
2. Become Irresistibly Magnetic to women
3. Seduce Wife Like Crazy

CR James is the author of the new seduction book Super Sex Power. The first seduction book designed to increase your sexual value fast, because it features perception-driven seduction techniques. You can get a FREE seduction report for a limited time by clicking this link: http://superhappysex.com/limited-time

August 26, 2010

Great Relationship Advice: The Ability to Create a Vision for Your Relationship

Filed under: Business — Tags: , — CookSober4life @ 11:57 pm

Many of us stumble into marriage and then continue to make it up as we go along. But relationships need much more conscious planning in order to be successful. In a hectic and throwaway culture, couples need a vision for their relationship.

What is a relationship vision?

Just what is a relationship vision? It’s a deliberate design for your relationship: what you’re willing to give and what you would like to receive.

Designing a relationship vision involves asking questions such as “If we knew we couldn’t fail, how would we like this relationship to be?” and “If we could have it any way we wanted it, how would it be?” These are simply questions to get you started in designing your relationship.

Let’s take a look at five practical steps to creating a relationship vision and use an example from a couple I’ll call Bob and Mary.

Step 1: Decide on an area of the relationship you would like to design and improve. Bob and Mary say they want to spend more time together despite busy schedules and two children.

Step 2: Brainstorm for ways you can achieve your shared goal. Be creative; no idea is too silly or impossible at this stage. For our couple, it might be that one or both quit their jobs and run off to an island, or start their own business, or meet for lunch a few times a week.

Step 3: Choose two or three of the ideas that will send you in the direction you want to go. Bob and Mary chose meeting for lunch.

Step 4: Assign tasks to each partner including a deadline. Bob and Mary agreed that they would both clear the schedules and honor their lunch meetings as they would other business appointments. Bob would have to go to work earlier on the days he met his wife for lunch.

Step 5: Follow through. No matter how good your intentions, both partners must honor their commitment to each other. Their lunches give Bob and Mary time together without the children and provide them both with relief from the stress of the work week.

What Bob and Mary did may not work for you. Simply find what does work for you and remember to ask,

What would if be like if …?

Visit SecretsofGreatRelationships.com for tips and tools for creating and growing a great relationship. You can also subscribe to our f*r*e*e 10 day e-program on how to enrich your relationship today, from relationship coach and expert Jeff Herring.

August 24, 2010

Three Qualities of a Good Relationship

Filed under: Business — Tags: , — f1mktsol @ 8:56 am

All relationships have some adjustment periods, but being hurt shouldn’t be part of being in love. Loving relationships have good qualities, such as support from your partner, a willingness to communicate, a desire to compromise, and open an honest communication. When you do not have these fundamental qualities in a relationship, that relationship isn’t likely to grow, and become something that you desire.

We all turn to our loved ones for support from time to time. When your loved one does not offer you their support it may be time to look at your relationship. As we all want to nurture those that we love. We want the best in life for those that we care about. If your partner is unwilling to listen to you, and to your problems, they are not meeting your needs when you need support. Support can come in many forms, someone lending an ear, someone going out of their way to help you, or something as simple as a phone call to cheer you up. Make sure your partner gives you support when you need it.

When engaging in a relationship with another person there is always going to be things that you do not agree upon. You want to have the ability to compromise so both partners are getting their wishes met. This may mean one night you watch football, and one night your partner watches a movie you enjoy. It might mean that your partner can agree to try a dish that you enjoy cooking. In any organization with more than one person in it, there will be more than one opinion, work with your partner to see that both of you can compromise on different subjects. If someone isn’t willing to compromise, they are not willing to acknowledge your wants and desires. If they can not acknowledge your wants they are likely not emotionally developed enough for you to have your needs met.

Open and honest communication is one of the more desirable qualities you want to have in a relationship. Watch to see that your partner is not secretive, nor are they willing to tell lies to avoid certain subjects. For example, if a partner is married, and fails to tell you that, you can rightfully assume if they can lie about big things, they can lie about small things. While you may not like everything your partner may say, freedom to be honest should be there in your relationship. Likewise, you need to be open and honest with your partner; a relationship based upon false truths is not likely to be successful, because both partners do not have the correct frame of reference in the relationship.

There are many qualities that make relationships good support, compromise, and open and honest communication is just a few of these qualities that you may desire in a relationship. Engage only in relationships where both partners can openly discuss their wants and needs, this can take practice. Remember loving relationships grow and only become better, eliminate those who do not meet your needs when they continually fail to support you, will not compromise, and will not be honest. These three qualities alone will help you nurture and develop a deeper relationship with your partner.

Stephanie Manley is the editor of Copykat.com, also writes about relationships at http://romancelessons.blogspot.com

August 23, 2010

Forgiveness

Filed under: Business — Tags: , — kathcom @ 11:57 pm

"The important thing to remember when it comes to forgiving is that forgiveness doesn’t make the other person right; it makes you free." –Stormie Omartian

How do we know if we need to forgive someone, something, or even ourselves? We know because we feel a gnawing sadness inside of us, although we may not know the cause.

The interesting thing about choosing not to forgive, is that it hurts us more than anyone else. Your inability to forgive anything or anyone in your world may hurt someone else a bit, but I guarantee it hurts you and your world a hundred times more.

As a visual example, think of two goal posts set twenty-feet apart. A more content and peaceful life rests just after the goal posts – all you have to-do is run through the twenty-foot space, blindfolded and voila, you will be closer to the life you want. It will be a little tough, granted your are blindfolded – but there is a big enough area where you should be able to break through to the other side with a few attempts. Unforgiveness is like an eighteen-foot wall. Place that between your goal posts and now try running toward that other side. Maybe you’ll get through. Most likely, you’ll get some bad bruises, or maybe a broken bone, and probably give up, believing that there really isn’t a space – just a brick wall. Like a wall, unforgiveness blocks our path.

Forgiveness Brings Freedom

An unforgiving nature is very costly in our lives. We may find ourselves attaching to other people in unhealthy ways, punishing other people, or losing hope in the world and in our peers.

The first step in forgiveness is to understand all the elements of the incident we are trying to forgive. We may be forgiving God, a person who harmed or hurt us, or a person who has harmed or hurt someone we love. We may be forgiving our parents, our society, our world, or ourselves. Forgiveness does not mean that we are condoning hurtful actions. It doesn’t mean that we accept inappropriate actions of others. Forgiveness does not mean that we forget how much we hurt. Forgiveness simply means that we acknowledge the deep pain we feel, but choose to move past that pain. We forgive those who contributed to our pain and let their actions become part of our past. We let go.

We can dislike what someone has done to us, but we can still forgive them and allow them to be someone new, instead of freeze-framing them in that hurtful place.

Sometimes looking at this in a different perspective can be extremely helpful. Think back and recall a time when you did something hurtful to someone. Perhaps you said something "off the cuff " that hurt someone’s feelings, or perhaps you did something you were ashamed about. Take a few moments to recollect the most vivid example that you can. Now think through the series of events that led up to your action. You did something hurtful and how did the other person respond? Did they eventually forgive you? What would happen if they hadn’t? What would happen if the person had stayed angry at you for that action? You made a mistake, a bad decision, or didn’t think before acting, and if they didn’t forgive you, they would never be able to see you how you are now. Unforgiveness chains people to their painful actions and pasts. We freeze that painful time. Can you see how that person would be missing all you could offer? Or how that person could become so focused on the pain you caused, that they would miss the other good happening around them?

A classic example is the spiteful lover. You have probably met someone like this or have seen a likeness depicted in a movie. They have been "wronged" somehow in a relationship and have become adamant that the opposite sex is "not worthy of their time." Instead of realizing they had a painful experience, acknowledging it and moving on, they continually focus on their pain. Meanwhile, one thousand perfect matches could walk right by and they would never know. They are too busy focusing on life’s injustices. Many friendships end this way. There is some fight or spat between close friends or neighbors, and instead of practicing forgiveness, people practice grudge-holding. Eventually, hearts grow bitter and less trusting.

At one point in my life, I was so concerned with how others saw me. I wanted to make sure everyone had the actual facts on which to base their thoughts and opinions. If someone held what I perceived to be an unfair view, I would go to great lengths to get my own "evidence" into their hands or to defend myself. I cannot tell you how exhausting this was. Liberation came when I made the decision to truly "let go." I began to focus only on blessing others – no matter what they thought of me. I quit trying to "present my case" and instead began to "live my life." Everyday I set out to live the best life, and do the best work I am capable of doing. I will let that action speak for itself.

Forgiveness means to "give as before." To quote John Bradshaw from his book The Family, "It means that we give up resentments and release the energy that has kept us in bondage."

Think about an event where you have not forgiven someone. Write down what emotions you feel when you recall that event. Now think back to a time before that event happened. Did you feel these emotions? You probably did not. When you forgive, you give yourself the freedom to let go of the hurtful emotions and enjoy the positive that can be found. When there aren’t any positives to be found, forgiveness gives us permission to let go, move forward and grow.

Even when we have been able to forgive those who have hurt us, we often cannot forgive ourselves. Many of us unfairly hold ourselves prisoner to unrealistic standards that we would never expect of another person. Patricia Commins writes, "self-love is the only way to move forward. It is the only cure for the wounds of the soul, the only escape route from the negative patterns of the past."

Self-Forgiveness Reality Check Exercise

Recall an incident for which you have not forgiven yourself. Write about the incident in your journal. Now close your eyes. Imagine a morning where you are sitting in your kitchen with a cup of coffee one morning when a dear friend knocks at your door. Your friend is trying to hold back her tears, but you know she has been crying from her tear-stained face. You invite her in and she crumbles into the chair across from you. When you ask what is wrong, she bursts into tears, mumbling her story of sadness through strained breath. Imagine that her story of sadness is the same or parallel to the event recorded in your journal. Visualize yourself advising your friend. What do you say? Do you make her feel worse, by amplifying her mistake? Do you lecture her, implying she should hold herself hostage to her mistake and let it cause unhappiness throughout her life? Or do you take a different tactic? Take a moment to thoroughly visualize your response, and then write about it in your journal.

A true friend would not let another friend suffer indefinitely – even for the worst of actions. Instead, a true friend would suggest accountability while encouraging self-forgiveness and forward movement. Try offering yourself that same wisdom.

Try another quick visualization. This time imagine it is you who is crying at the table. Take the same attitude with which you responded to your friend, and apply it to your situation. Write out the council you receive in your journal. Try this exercise whenever you feel you are being unforgiving of yourself.

Simple Self-Love Exercise

For those of us who have not practiced self-love, it can be a difficult concept to grasp. Begin with a simple gesture of self-directed love. Perhaps it is five minutes of uninterrupted reading, or a hot bubble bath, or a walk in nature, or meeting a friend for a cup of coffee. It can be anything that validates the importance of treating yourself well. Create a list in your journal of simple ways you can express self-love. Affirm your value daily by practicing one of these exercises.

Brook Noel is the author of The Change Your Life Challenge: A 70 Day Life Makeover Program for Women. Her unique program has helped thousands of women “makeover” all aspects of their lives. Learn more at http://www.changeyourlifechallenge.com

August 17, 2010

Friendship – A Relation of Choice!

Filed under: Business — Tags: , — dsanuva @ 11:57 pm

Introduction

Have you ever heard or have you ever seen, father-son; mother-daughter; husband-wife; boss-subordinates; brother-sister as a friend? Might be yes, but how often and how genuine. At the end of a day, the message is, "mein tumhara baap hoon, jo mein kahta hoon, who karo" (I am your father, do what I say). Recently, I posted one query, "Can an adult male and female be just friends", and replies are just shocking (read below). That is why, I say, friendship is a relation of choice. But, do you know the meaning of "FRIENDSHIP", yes, you know, you have read in some newspapers and magazines, but what about applying the same.

Understanding Friendship

Before I start I know, as you probably know, that a friendship can be an antidote for loneliness or depression or even boredom. But it should be just more than an antidote for these problems. What are the qualities that lead to a solid friendship?

First of all, friendship must be genuine. In friendships we reveal what we are and who we are capable of becoming. Friendships demand that we reveal ourselves without pretenses or masks, without affection or deception. G.K. Chesterton knowing the risks involved in cultivating a solid friendship, summed it up when he said, “Friends are those with whom our faults are safe.”

Another ingredient necessary for the cultivation of a friendship is that one must be generous. The friendship is its own reward. Christ summed up the element of generosity when he said, “greater love than this no one has than he who lays down his life for his friend.”

Another quality needed for a friendship is that it be gratuitous. It is a free donation or offering of one person to another. Friendship is never marred by jealousy. There must be a certain freedom between the two friends. Otherwise, there could be the problem of possessiveness or even suffocation of the friendship.

Other qualities could be mentioned so that solid friendships can be cultivated. A sense of humor, charity, understanding, compassion is only some of the ingredients that have to be cultivated for a solid friendship with another.

Just one more thought on this subject. For many people in this world, life is cold, lonely and hard. If they had one friend, their lives would not only be different, but happier. A friendship is a touch of heaven on earth. And you can bring a touch of heaven into someone’s life.

Friendship between male and female

Strong friendships between a man and woman are sometimes difficult to understand and accept though relationships between two women or men is more readily accepted by our society. When a man and woman hold hands in public, automatically they are assumed to be lovers. Friends are friends and lovers are lovers! Very few people are physically affectionate with their friends. People find it difficult to dissociate love from sex. If two people express love and affection for each other it is assumed that they are lovers. The truth is fairly simple: two people like each other, are comfortable together and a special bond of friendship develops between them.

Sometimes friendship is taken for granted and people are willing to give it up when they fall in love, want to marry or have a long term relationship. Sexual or romantic love is assumed to be better and therefore preferred.

There are certain factors, which affects such relations:

1) Circumstances, in which the friendship has been made

2) Intentions of both parties and purpose of the relation

3) Prior experiences, education level, family values, culture and beliefs

4) Age-group

5) Number of friends, from opposite gender.

If the sexual element in a relationship is lost, no friendship is left and the couple moves away from each other in every respect. Instead of seeing sexual relationships as friendships, which include sex, couples often see them as separate from any kind of friendship. If people could break away from this tradition they could be friends with their lovers and ex-lovers and enjoy close, happy and meaningful relationships. This would also reflect a certain amount of growth and maturity of the personality.

My Gift to all my friends for their Friendship

I love you not only for what you are,

but for what I am when I am with you.

I love you not only for what you have made of yourself,

but for what you are making of me.

I love you for the part of me that you bring out.

I love you for putting your hand into my heaped-up heart,

and passing over all the foolish and frivolous and weak things which you cannot help dimly seeing there, and for drawing out into the light all the beautiful, radiant belongings, that no one else had looked quite far enough to find.

I love you for ignoring the possibilities of the fool

and weakling in me,
and for laying firm hold
on the possibilities of good in me.

I love you for closing your eyes to the discords in me,

and for adding to the music in me by worshipful listening.

I love you because you are helping me

to make of the lumber of my life not a tavern but a Temple, and of the words of my every day not a reproach but a song.

I love you because you have done more

than any creed could have done to make me good, and more than any fate could have done to make me happy.

You have done it just by being yourself.

Perhaps that is what being a friend means after all

Saying so, I never mean to say that, I will be giving you solutions for all your problems

As a friend, I may not be able to give solutions to all of life’s problems, doubts, or fears; but I can listen to you, and together we can seek answers. I can’t change your past with all its heartache and pain, nor the future with it’s untold stories; but I can be there now when you need me to care.

I can’t keep your feet from stumbling. I can only offer my hand that you may grasp it and not fall. Your joys, triumphs, successes, and happiness are not mine; yet I can share in your laughter and joy.

Your decisions in life are not mine to make, nor to judge; I can only support you, encourage you, and help you when you ask. I can’t give you boundaries, which I have determined for you, But I can give you the room to change, room to grow, room to be yourself.

I can’t keep your heart from breaking and hurting, but I can cry with you and help you pick up the pieces and put them back in place. I can’t tell you who you are. I can only love you and be your friend.

And every morning when you open your eyes, tell yourself that it is special. Every day, every minute, every second is a gift from God, you’ve got to dance like nobody’s watching, and love like it’s never going to hurt.

People say true friends must always hold hands, but true friends don’t need to hold hands because they know the other hand will always be there.

Conclusion

"Friendship is the comfort, the inexpressible comfort of feeling safe with a person having neither to weigh thoughts nor measure words, but pouring all right out just as they are, chaff and grain together, certain that a faithful friendly hand will take and sift them, keep what is worth keeping and, with a breath of comfort, blow the rest away."

Not only in Friendship but also in all the relations love is the driving force that creates and sustains it. The kind of love friends have for each other is the desire to know, serve and share. It is the antithesis of lust – the desire to acquire, possess and control. It is what makes one want to connect with another human consciousness – intellectually, emotionally and physically.

Unspoken doubts and suspicions are barriers that limit the possible depth to which a friendship can progress. Love empowers friends to say how they feel about each other without inhibition or fear of hurting each other’s feelings. It thereby allows them to resolve their doubts and suspicions about each other, thus removing the barriers and opening the way to an ever-deeper friendship.

Because friends love each other, one never attempts to force, coerce or control the other to change for the better. One friend only informs the other of the way he or she feels. Love will motivate the informed friend to change him or herself for the better. Because friends love each other, they will never use each other as a means to an end – as a human resource to be used and abused for self gain. A friend – as a precious sentient consciousness – is an end in him or herself. That end is the joy of sharing experiences and reciprocal love.

Let me know, what you have to say about it.

With lots of love and care,

Sanjeev Sharma
Pune-India
Mobile: +91-9890788259
E-mail: s070976@yahoo.co.in; ss_himachali@yahoo.com
Blog: http://sanjeevhimachali.blogspot.com/
For my articles on BPO industry, log on to www.bpoindia.org/research/

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